“I’m Not A Monster”

This post is about a parent simply wanting to spend time with the children they helped create without the usual games that always happen when it is their time for visitation. Anyone that follows this blog or my talking points know that some people are always playing a game and using the children. As with most parents that live a long distance from their children, summer visitation is important and the custodial parent knows this so not sure why it has to be difficult. I always welcome comments/emails from my readers, including those that disagree, but please read the whole article 🙂
Wednesday, April 29th, 2015
Subject: Summer Visitation
Hi —,
I am writing to inquire about when/if you will be allowing our daughters to come visit their daddy this summer. Please try to let me know so I can make plans if I need to get them out to CA.
I have sent my new address to the courts and attorneys but will give to you in this email as well. (Address followed)
Thanks,
Friday, May 1st, 2015
Subject: Summer Visitation II
Hi —,
I have not heard back from you on my email from April 29th so I wanted to follow up.
April 29th Email:
I am writing to inquire about when/if you will be allowing our daughters to come visit their daddy this summer. Please try to let me know so I can make plans if I need to get them out to CA.
I have sent my new address to the courts and attorneys but will give to you in this email as well. (Address followed)
Thanks,
Sunday, May 10th, 2015
Subject: Happy Mother’s Day
Hi —,
I hope you get to relax and enjoy your day with all the kiddos.
Sunday, May 10th, 2015
Subject: Happy Mother’s Day                                                                                                                                                                                                               
Thank you.  It was a nice day with family 🙂  Hope you,—, and ——– were able to enjoy the day as well.  By the way-  The girls have gifts for — that we will be putting in the mail tomorrow.                                                                                                                                                                                
Monday, May 11th, 2015
Subject: Summer Visitation II
Monday, May 11, 2015                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

Hi —-,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        

I am truly sorry that this email response has taken so long…  It’s been one busy week!  Nonetheless, I do want to discuss summer visitation.  I absolutely want our daughters to spend time with you..  It is essential to them to have time with both of us.  I do, however, have concerns. First, they are very active in dance/ gymnastics.  —–’s recital is June 14th, and she has been working very hard to prepare for this- I do not want her to miss it.  Additionally, as you know ——- has committed to being on the gymnastics team.  This commitment requires several things- First, and foremost, 8hours of practice with her team per week.  There is also the matter of her gym/ team fees which are about $165 per month- even if we/ she is away on vacation.  She also has 6 meets per year, the dates of which are still TBA.  I would be willing to discuss with her coach the option of her practicing in CA if there is any that you could arrange that…  The time spent practicing there should be pretty close to the 8hrs required.  This is HER passion, she is good, and I want to continue to support and encourage her.  Who knows, it could also mean lots of great things for her future like scholarships, ect.  ——– also sees the dentist (under anesthesia in the main OR due to her airway being so complicated) for routine follow up and cleaning on June 23, and I really don’t want to reschedule this.  The first day of School for the 2015-2016 year is Aug. 3, 2015.  Finally, I have to be honest… I am so anxious about letting go of them again after the nightmare that was last summer.  I understand that you thought you were doing what was best for them and I don’t wish to rehash the details, but I hope that you can understand my anxiety. I am not a monster, and I love our girls more than anything else in this world.  They are my heart and soul…                    

I hope that we can work this out for the best interests of everyone but, most importantly, for the best interests of our daughters.                            

I look forward to hearing back from you.                                                                                                                                                                                          

Monday, May 11th, 2015
Subject: Summer Visitation II
Hi —,
I knew what you were going to reply with before you even responded. How about July 1st to August 1st? As for last year, we both know the truth of what happened and how I got punished for protecting the girls. I have no time for games. If you truly want them to visit their daddy then let them. If you are going to deny access then just do so. This should not even be an issue and is not complicated.
Thanks,
Monday, May 18th, 2015
Subject: Summer Visitation II
Hi —,
I am trying to reach out one last time to see if OUR girls, that we made together, are going to be allowed to visit their daddy and sister that they love for summer visitation. As I let you know already, — is putting together her schedule for July and August at this time. Also, ——– has activities that will need scheduled around so if you would be so kind to let me know that would be very adult of you. If you will be denying our girls the opportunity to see us please just say so instead of leaving us hanging. Thanks in advance for taking 5 minutes to respond.
Tuesday, May 19th, 2015
Subject: Summer Visitation II
Hi —-,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       
I was intentional in taking some “time out” prior to returning email correspondence in hopes that your hateful tone was simply the result of a “bad day” .  The email response that I sent you originally was honest and genuine- in no way, shape, or form was it intended to be a “game” as you have implied.  Foolishly, after we had a good conversation on the phone, I believed that a line of communication had been opened between us – you see, this is what RATIONAL parents do. Communicate. However, I see now that I was wrong in expressing my concerns to you for your concern continues to revolve around you, you, you, and you.  I realize that we both made OUR girls – but where are you when OUR girls need school fees, school clothes, new shoes, instruments for school, extracurricular activities?? Being a father is not just summer vacation. Speaking of summer, I would also like to clarify a few things. Lets begin by clarifying I am not denying the girls the opportunity to see you –YOU are.  The courts held parenting time – not me. The courts were also very clear in stating that you could easily get this all straightened out simply by showing up to court. Additionally, I have no problem working with you, however I can see now that there is no clear, open line of communication and I will not be talked down to or submit to your hostility.                                                                                          
Sincerely,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  
Tuesday, May 19th, 2015
Subject: Summer Visitation II
Hi —,
I only have a few things to say in response to your email as I will not continue this game that you and —– have been playing with the children’s best interest. First to address the “good” phone conversation you talk about. Is this the one where, as a good father, I bit my tongue so hard it bled and told you I held no hard feelings from what you have done to destroy our girls? Yes, I think about my children first.
You talk about the family court making a ruling that, as we both know, was based on your lies. Had you went into court and said “Judge, I medically neglected my daughters, abused them physically, abused them emotionally and completely disregarded them as humans.” as was the truth, then there may have been a different outcome. See, maybe you have forgotten on who filed the court case in an attempt to protect these very children that you continue to destroy and not put first.
Nice to know you can put a price on their heads. Did you not get a large payoff amount when I got my disability settlement? Do you not get a check for each child evey month? I noticed you equated visitation with support..classy. Speaking of support and how I am such a bad father, who finally got the children’s medical care that you deliberately and purposefully forgot for years?
You go ahead and keep playing mother of the year for everyone else but we both know what you really are. Why do you mention to me several times in text messages, phone converations and emails that “you are not a monster”…I guess you are trying to convince yourself.
You mention being nervous about sending the girls out for the summer and I would be to if I was you, as they would tell the secrets of your house. Maybe this is why you continue to make ANY communication with the girls difficult? It must be hard to be a fraud and very scary to know that you will have to answer to those innocent girls when they become adults.
One final question….is what you are doing in the best intrerest of the children? I do not need any further response from you as “I wouldn’t believe you if your tongue was notarized.”
You have definitely hurt me deeply and put me in the hospital a few times with your actions….congratulations. You will never be able to take the children’s memories in their heads or the love in their hearts for their daddy 🙂
From the author: I started this blog, back in late October 2014, as a way to deal with the parental alienation or PA and the broken, unjust family court system, CPS and governments that continues to hurt great parents and destroy our most precious future resource: CHILDREN                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            
I never had a true direction in which I was going but wanted to channel my anger and depression in a useful way for myself, my family and others. Along the way I have used personal experiences to expose issues that millions of people across the world are battling daily. I have had the opportunity to educate many adults not aware of this nasty secret but upon discovering the truth become advocates for shared parenting and a call to stop parental alienation. I take what I type on my blog seriously and would never lie to make my point about these horrible subjects. I do not try to cause trouble or damage anyone, as you see if you are guilty then just face it so we can move on to better our children. I am not a perfect person or parent, as not one of us are, but I have always learned and made myself a much better person and parent from mistakes so I do not continue to make them again.                                                                                                                                        
I urge eveyone who reads this blog to please learn more about parental alienation and the horrible life long damage you cause to your children. If you know someone destroying their children with PA then please help them to correct their actions before it is too late. If you are a parent guilty of this then please, please, please love your children more than you hate your ex. The damage will be forever and one day you or your children may be alienated by the same methods.                                                                                                                                                    
Lastly, to any politicians, judges or people in power….when are you going to quit putting a price on our children? At what point does the destruction of generations not topple even the most powerful government?                                                                                                                          
Time to change…if you are not part of the solution then you are part of the problem!!                                                               
whatever helps you sleep
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